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What No One Tells You When You Want to Get Your Life Together

The best thing about wanting to change your life is that you can do it by the time you finish reading this sentence.

Becoming a different person who has healthy habits and achievable goals, who works out regularly and eats well and reads books bla bla bla, you know the type.

That Girl. (or person)

Lots of people say that it doesn’t happen overnight but, it kinda does.

Your past doesn’t define you. The last couple of seconds don’t define you. What defines you is what you’re doing right now. If you decide to get up right now and grab an apple out of your kitchen and start eating it, amazing, you’re a person who eats healthy.

If you decide to stop reading this blog post (you should keep reading but for the sake of the analogy) and go and pick up a book instead, wonderful, you’re a person who reads.

The thing about change is that it can be quite scary and daunting. I think most people’s downfall (or mine in particular) is thinking about the future, an entire lifetime of making better decisions sounds, rightfully, really tiring! Especially when you’re so used to making the same not-so-great decisions over and over.

You definitely shouldn’t feel bad about that, but you should know that it’s not as hard as it seems.

You just need to be ready to change.

I’ve spent the last couple of years trying to lose weight and read more and exercise and do all that waking up 5 am stuff and it never worked because deep down, I knew I wasn’t ready for all that.

(Also you don’t have to wake up at 5 am if you don’t want to. I don’t know why there’s this made-up correlation between waking up early and having your life together. I only say this because I happen to like really early mornings but if you don’t, that’s absolutely fine).

But now, I think I am ready. Because it doesn’t (for the most part) feel like work anymore.

And I now understand the one thing that’s been tripping me up about all these people who seem to have their lives together all the time.

You’re allowed not to like it.

You’re allowed to complain! No one ever told me that! For this whole time, I thought these smoothie-drinking, vitamin-popping, treadmill-bopping weirdos were enjoying it the whole time. But they also groan when their alarm goes off at 5 am sometimes and they also crave those Fox’s chocolate chip cookies with milk chocolate drizzled on top (I’d give it all for a packet of those, jesus).

But they still do it. That’s the difference.

It’s just like Instagram. People only show you their smiley faces whilst effortlessly floating above their Peloton bikes, and their spotless kitchens as they make their third aesthetically pleasing acai bowl of the day.

So it looks like they’ve found some new dimension of life where people actually enjoy that stuff all the time.

Take Thursday for example. It’s the fourth day of me trying to make better choices. It’s around 6 pm, I’ve just finished work and all I want to do is sit on the couch and play Stardew Valley with my boyfriend.

At that moment I had a choice. I could either do what was comfortable and play Stardew Valley and throw away my last four days of effort (which included daily movement in either workouts or 7000 steps for the day and healthy eating),

Or I could continue on my path, respect my decision and get up to do 30 minutes of cardio instead.

I did the cardio. And that’s another day added to my mental scoresheet. (And another tick on my really cute Notion tracker, hehe)

Because that’s when it mattered. At that moment. The present. I decided who I wanted to be; I was a person who does workouts.

And as a nice bonus, I can say that I’ve been intentionally moving my body every day this week.

The thing about changing your life is that you need to be ready to do it. And it won’t be easy and you’re allowed to acknowledge that.

That’s what really did it for me. Because every time I had tried and failed before, I just kept feeling so guilty about the fact that I didn’t have a big smile on my face as I was doing all these things.

But now I feel like I’m ready.

And the best part is that you’re training your brain to make this you're new normal, so eventually it won’t even feel like choices, they’ll just be second nature.

What also helped me was watching this video by Leo Skepi. I found it at just the perfect time and it really helped me get serious about becoming the person I’ve wanted to be for years now. (If you’re not into tough love, this may not be for you, just a heads up).

And if you’re in the mood to hear other people’s personal growth stories for even more inspiration, pick up a copy of my magazine, jaden, which you can download or buy a print copy from my etsy shop!

Thanks for reading! I’ll see you next week.

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