24 Comments
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Courtenay Schembri Gray's avatar

Are we twins? This is literally me! Whenever someone asks what I’ve been doing, my go to response is: “Just reading and writing.” I can’t go out drinking! I find it SO boring! I need a book or a podcast to keep me entertained!

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candice's avatar

god maybe because same !! even at work people ask me and i'm like "just did some reading" and it was a bloody good time but it sounds so lame out loud?? but i am working on that haha

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Shay B. Keats's avatar

I love this piece and how much I relate. My last time at a club I was 20. Have not been blackout drunk since I was 18 and that was something of an accident (I was actually sick and on antibiotics lol). I love getting into my bed. I love dressing for comfort. Sometimes I see my other friends go a little crazy with each other and I’m suddenly struck that I may be “the boring friend”. But it suits me. Glad you’re feeling better about your lifestyle, which is entirely yours to own!

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candice's avatar

thank you for sharing and your kind words <3 happy that you're okay with who you are now! normalise being okay with being the boring friend i guess haha

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Naseerah's avatar

This was such a validating read and something I am learning to be comfortable with in my mid 20s🧡 thank you for sharing!

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candice's avatar

this makes me really happy! I'm so glad, thank you for reading <3

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Amanda Greenidge's avatar

Wow I feel so seen in this piece! There IS immense pressure to be out all the time, at a bar, club, etc. and there is a guilt in not wanting so much of that anymore. Getting older does make it easier to lean into my true pleasures in life and say goodbye to what I’m “supposed to be doing.”

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Andrielle The Oracle's avatar

Settling into how you are as a person in your late twenties can be so fucking satisfying when you cycle out systemic social behaviors and curate a lifestyle strategy that works best for who you are authentically.

Kudos, haute piece for the borings of the world.

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candice's avatar

literallyyyy I love this phase haha & thank you !!

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Khayla Deans's avatar

I love this reflection! New subscriber here. Your reflection mirrors many times I lamented and worried that “I didn’t know how to have fun” in my teens & 20s. Now in my early 30s I am embracing my joy for daytime activities, going to the garden, & having hobbies. In college my friends who went out to the bar/clubs every weekend assumed I was just in my dorm room because I didn’t go “out.” But I just did things that brought me joy which included seeing live performances, films, art things, etc. I learned how to have fun in my own way that makes sense to me. And when they needed a break from the parties they knew to hit me up to do something new lol.

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candice's avatar

yes! we're the chill cool down friends which I think is something to be really happy about! it's a great quality to have😄 love that you're able to embrace your hobbies now and that you know exactly that brings you joy without second guessing yourself🩷 &thank you for subscribing!!

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Sasha's avatar

I love this so much! It's important we understand who we are and not be ashamed of it. I remember when I dreaded telling people that I love reading, I felt it would make them see me as boring, but what even is boring?

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candice's avatar

exactly! what is boring really?? it's just preferences at the end of the day (but whatever it is, it's definitely not reading ha)

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Rachel Leeke Alexis's avatar

I was never the club friend in my 20s, I'd go for a birthday or seldom occasion but I'd be liable to fall asleep - which has happened more than once. Thank you for the relatable read. Your panda candle holder is adorable.

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candice's avatar

goodness yes i've been falling asleep at parties since i was a teenager haha glad there are more of us out there! thank you for reading <3 & thank you it's actually just a mug that got cracked but i didn't want to throw away :')

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Rachel Leeke Alexis's avatar

Sleepy gang we here! 😂

The next time a vessel cracks I’ll keep that in mind as a way to recycle.

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Taylor Gardner's avatar

Yes!!!!! I see you soft and rest-prioritising, hot chocolate-drinking, comfort-loving, easy to be around effortlessly girlie ❤️❤️❤️

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candice's avatar

this is so LOVELY.

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Emmanuella's avatar

Great piece! Part of what fully made me relax in this was realizing that my friends or other people I know that are particularly more extroverted wouldn’t feel odd about not liking the same things I do

It isn’t as crazy for somebody to say they never read books or enjoy extended time just being by themselves, and so it makes no sense that I should feel any type of way about enjoying the things that I enjoy.

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candice's avatar

this is so so true and i need to remind myself of this more often. i wouldn't look at someone strangely for wanting to have a full calendar (maybe a bit) but if that's what they like then that's what they like!

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Jessica Alice's avatar

"redoing my Notion setup" - oh my gosh, are you me?? lol. And I am the same type of friend that you are 💛 also 27!

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candice's avatar

hahaha i was hoping someone would relate to that bit specifically!! omg wow hi twin

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Kate Heceta-Arellano's avatar

I was literally that girl in my late teens and early 20s who was always out clubbing and it got real old, real fast. In my mid-20s up to now some people ask me why I'm no longer down to go out. That's because I was such a hard partier when I was younger and I quickly got so sick of that lifestyle and realized I was only doing it because that's what was expected of people my age. I also wish it didn't take getting older to own what you like to do, but I genuinely feel so much better now that "going out" for me means dinner with a couple glasses of wine, wrapping up at 9 or 10pm, and back in bed with a book right after. I consider myself very much an extrovert, but I now confidently own being an extrovert who cares about getting a proper amount of sleep. I love that you're more confident in your lifestyle and habits now!

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candice's avatar

maybe it's a rite of passage for everyone in their 20s to be like actually, i'd prefer to do this and i don't care if you don't like it, which feels quite good! so glad you understand and that you've become comfortable with who you are too! <3 go get your 8 hours girlie

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