no phone signal, no care in the world

quiet notes from my journal #2

240425

i look at my phone and there is no signal.

no panic, instead, a tiny sense of peace settles in. when i look out of the window of our temporary little home in the country, i can see vast amounts of grass sectioned off by wonky fences and uneven hedges. i see two furry animals i can’t quite make out at this distance, rabbits i think, chasing each other under a sky where the clouds are beginning to part like curtains at a theatre show. the sun, the main event, soon to make its entrance. the two animals look like last minute guests arriving just in time for the show to begin. me, i’ve been sat here for a while admiring the curtain. the misty, blurred effect the clouds are creating in the sky makes my eyes hurt a little, but in this tiny home secluded from sounds of traffic and any other form of human life altogether, i relish in the sense that i might be the only person seeing this right now.

and here comes the main event, somewhere off to the right, out of frame, the sun casts a golden hue on the sides of trees and the large bushes that line what appears to be the beginning of a small pond being made. i imagine these bushes, with just half of their bodies illuminated, feel like how i do sitting in the car and the sun beams on only one side of my face, like i am the moon. the sun shines but only for a moment. if you missed it you missed it. a teaser for what is to come later on in the day perhaps. the clouds are being selfish, they want to keep the warmth for themselves. the birds are chirping now, encore! encore! maybe it was a cold night and they’ve been waiting since dawn to stretch their wings in the total warm embrace of the morning sun, like their mothers used to do when they were young, cuddle them under her wing, the subtle sound of a heartbeat quietly thumping against their tiny heads.