read this if you're sick of winter

blue skies, fresh flowers, nature walks, sunshine—it's all right around the corner!

For the past day or so, I have noticed something different about the sky. I usually wake up very early, around 5 to 6 am, to a pitch black sky, and I wait patiently for the sun to bring out that blueish hue that I love so much. But since the start of this year, I feel like I have only seen a number of blue skies that I can count on one hand. I’m sure of it.

So when I saw the sky turn a recognisable colour of blue, when I saw that the roads were visible not by the streetlamps either side of them, when I saw that all of this was happening before 7 am, I knew the end of our long, grey, numbing winter was finally coming to an end.

I am not one to rush things. I am a long-standing hater of the phrase “Thank god it’s Friday”. But we all have our exceptions and for me, spring is one of them. I am desperately waiting for 1st March like a lover waiting for her husband to return from war. Please come back home, please make me whole again, let’s go back to how things were. And I know 1st March isn’t the official first day of spring and it’s even longer until the clocks change, but I simply can’t wait that long.

I’ve got my faux spring flower bouquet on standby; I’m crouched at the corner of my local Tesco like a 100m sprinter at the Olympics, waiting for the starter pistol to signal an appropriate time to buy daffodils and pink tulips; I’m stood at my kitchen window, legs shoulder width apart, my boyfriend’s binoculars in hand focusing on the nearest tree to decipher whether leaves are starting to sprout yet. I’m an agent in the field. I’m a spook with a sniper rifle with spring flower seeds as ammo. I’m Monica at Phoebe’s wedding with a headset and clipboard triple-checking everything is going according to nature’s plan.

Are you as excited for spring as I am? Probably not.

Here’s what is right around the corner:

• sunshine filtering through the trees and then filtering through net curtains or through the leaves of your houseplants and making pretty patterns on your carpets or wood floors

• random patches of your floors at home that have been loved by the sun and stepping on them unknowingly with bare feet, staying there for a while

• coming home from work guided by the sun instead of the moon trapped behind clouds

• sunsets you can watch from your sofa instead of the obstructed view from your office window because you’ll be at home when the sun ends her longer shifts

• vibrant green leaves poking their heads out of bare tree branches, how excited they must feel, how fresh and new it all is for them

• that spring is the official time for new beginnings, that it’s okay to start again after new years

• an abundance of tiny daisies poking out of slightly overgrown grass

• wildflowers in general

• waking up to blue skies, sunshine and birdsong

• nature walks without boots, hats, long coats and scarves, letting the edges of blades of grass tickle your calves, being able to hold the weightless life of a flower in your hand, having the physical freedom to take in everything nature has to offer

• light jackets

• that random week in early to mid May where it is nearly too hot and you wonder if it’s too early for a sundress and you start to think about the weeks on end where you’ll have the opportunity to wear that sundress again and again and again

• the perfect degree of heat on your cheeks

• saying goodbye to your long winter coats and thick jumpers

• the call of the soft life getting louder, filling your home with fresh flowers, slow walks through parks with friends, drinking tea and coffee outdoors and people watching, watching life unfold once again

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hello quiet readers, i hope you’re all doing well and have also noticed the sky getting a little brighter earlier in the mornings! this phase of s.a.d has been probably one of the toughest but i’m so glad we’re nearly at the end of it all.

also, i wanted to scream a little about there being over 1000 of you here now! wow! thank you so much for being here, my little heart can’t take it. after 10+ years of writing online, i never thought i would get this many people reading what i have to say. 16-year-old me is very jealous but happy for me nonetheless. i’m off to buy a huge bouquet of pink tulips to celebrate :’)

here is my lastest post if you missed it on non-performative ways to track your hobbies (which has gotten so much love i have simply fallen down) and here is my lastest youtube video which is very bookish if you like that sort of thing.

i hope you all have a wonderful rest of your week, and i’ll see you next wednesday <3

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