solo dates are scary for me as someone who is co dependent in a lot of ways…but i’m also slowly trying to break out of that habit so i think i need to do it soon!
I love this post, but please Candice, don't kid yourself it's normal to be anxious before going out. I'm introverted and auDHD (autistic & ADHD), and I sometimes get anxious before going out into the world. But the only way to get over it is to keep practicing by going out more often. That doesn't mean staying out all day, but it might mean going out of the house every single day, even if just for a walk.
As a trainee counsellor, the normalization of anxiety in today's world is BONKERS. You're describing social anxiety, whether you're neurotypical or not. Also please check out Vitamin D deficiency! According to naturopathic doctor Lara Briden, optimal vitamin D levels are 29 - 60 ng/mL (72.5 - 150 nmol/L), much higher than most doctors consider 'normal'.
honestly its such a part of my everyday life sometimes I forget that it's not normal at all :( but you're right it definitely helps to get out more simply to get used to the feeling but I feel like I reset every year bc I just hate being outside in the winter and equally have no motivation ugh. and I'm thinking about making an appointment about the vitamin d thing bc i am certainly not helping myself by not going out often lol but when my partner and i move (we live with terrible neighbours which makes it harder to leave the house) I'm heading out every single day mark my words!!
thank you for the rec! i think embracing the cosiness definitely helped last year so i will be making more of an effort and add to this by going outside when winter rolls around again this year :')
This is such a good reminder to get back into dates with myself! I'm doing it irregularly ever since reading the Artist's Way a few years back. I even took a course in it. But somehow I always think it means taking myself to a boring museum. But it can be anything, of course... Like you I also am an introvert and have lots of indoor/at-home hobbies. It is definitely needed to go outside as well for me!
I also think I must go to an art gallery😅 which is a good time but you're right it can be anything we want! also that course sounds really interesting, it sounds like you got a lot out of it🥰
I joined a book club about Artist’s Way last year but couldn’t keep up with the meetings. I also found myself not doing the morning pages properly, but I truly feel that I need this book and those solo dates right now
I’m in a transitional phase of life where everything is starting to make sense, including finding your newsletter filled with such deep, soulful writing. I’m really looking forward to your next stories 🥹
i love that it's something that we have collectively decided to take at our own pace even though it says it's a 6 week programme, it's so much more than a little course or whatever you know so don't feel bad about missing a few days and such! also how sweet are you! that's such a kind comment thank you so much, I hope you enjoy what's to come!🩷🩷
I'm almost done with week 2 of The Artist's Way. I'm really enjoying it so far. I love the artist dates. I even push myself to treat it like a real date. I do my hair and makeup and pick out a cute outfit.
solo dates are scary for me as someone who is co dependent in a lot of ways…but i’m also slowly trying to break out of that habit so i think i need to do it soon!
yes i think i struggle with that too :( but also trying to work on it so you have someone on your side there🫶🏾
I love this post, but please Candice, don't kid yourself it's normal to be anxious before going out. I'm introverted and auDHD (autistic & ADHD), and I sometimes get anxious before going out into the world. But the only way to get over it is to keep practicing by going out more often. That doesn't mean staying out all day, but it might mean going out of the house every single day, even if just for a walk.
As a trainee counsellor, the normalization of anxiety in today's world is BONKERS. You're describing social anxiety, whether you're neurotypical or not. Also please check out Vitamin D deficiency! According to naturopathic doctor Lara Briden, optimal vitamin D levels are 29 - 60 ng/mL (72.5 - 150 nmol/L), much higher than most doctors consider 'normal'.
honestly its such a part of my everyday life sometimes I forget that it's not normal at all :( but you're right it definitely helps to get out more simply to get used to the feeling but I feel like I reset every year bc I just hate being outside in the winter and equally have no motivation ugh. and I'm thinking about making an appointment about the vitamin d thing bc i am certainly not helping myself by not going out often lol but when my partner and i move (we live with terrible neighbours which makes it harder to leave the house) I'm heading out every single day mark my words!!
I haven't read this yet, but I've heard that the book Frequently Happy by David Larbi is good for people who don't like winter.
I'm not a winter lover either, but funnily enough I have found I enjoy it more when I wrap up and force myself outside!!
thank you for the rec! i think embracing the cosiness definitely helped last year so i will be making more of an effort and add to this by going outside when winter rolls around again this year :')
This is such a good reminder to get back into dates with myself! I'm doing it irregularly ever since reading the Artist's Way a few years back. I even took a course in it. But somehow I always think it means taking myself to a boring museum. But it can be anything, of course... Like you I also am an introvert and have lots of indoor/at-home hobbies. It is definitely needed to go outside as well for me!
I also think I must go to an art gallery😅 which is a good time but you're right it can be anything we want! also that course sounds really interesting, it sounds like you got a lot out of it🥰
Haha I love that, funny I am not the only one thinking this! Totally. Thank you!!
i’m getting to the end of week 2 of artists way right now!!! i was going to write a substack about this too lol
oooh definitely do it! if anything it's a great way to self reflect through the process!
thank you for sharing that ❤️
I joined a book club about Artist’s Way last year but couldn’t keep up with the meetings. I also found myself not doing the morning pages properly, but I truly feel that I need this book and those solo dates right now
I’m in a transitional phase of life where everything is starting to make sense, including finding your newsletter filled with such deep, soulful writing. I’m really looking forward to your next stories 🥹
the artist dates were also my favorite part of the artist's way when I did it! They're so so great!
isn't it such a lovely idea!🥰
Love going on solo dates! Also, I haven’t been able to get past morning pages in the artists way 🫠😩
we'll get there some day😅
i love that it's something that we have collectively decided to take at our own pace even though it says it's a 6 week programme, it's so much more than a little course or whatever you know so don't feel bad about missing a few days and such! also how sweet are you! that's such a kind comment thank you so much, I hope you enjoy what's to come!🩷🩷
I'm almost done with week 2 of The Artist's Way. I'm really enjoying it so far. I love the artist dates. I even push myself to treat it like a real date. I do my hair and makeup and pick out a cute outfit.